Jealousy

Once the jealousy starts, it never goes away. Once you get into the mindset of wondering what she is doing all the time, the images are very difficult to shake. I did make a trip back into the club (which I never do) to pick her up one night and I could not find her. I eventually saw her in the VIP room dancing for someone (mining convention, lots of $US floating around that night).

What I saw was her naked (obviously), with the customers hands on her ass and she had her head right up against his and was whispering things in his ear. She is very good at her job, I can see why he ended up spending $1500 on her that night. Unfortunately I would have given her $15,000 to be able to shake that image.

Anyway, a small sidetrack from my original thought, but still a different angle on Jealousy. So she came back from Las Vegas all smiles, had a great time and I was considering ending it. I told her this on the phone while she was away. I got so carried away I went to the airport to watch her get off the plane with this guy. I did this, the other two strippers had guys pick them up and my girlfriend got in a limo with the customer. I was convinced I could not take this any more and walked right up to the limo to tell her we are done.

She saw me coming, grabbed her stuff and ran out of the limo without even saying goodbye to the guy. I saw the guy for the first time and he was old, overweight, and quite unattractive. He must have looked pretty funny in Vegas with 3 beautiful strippers on his arms all weekend! So obvious!

We had to come to some understanding after this incident or it was over. What I went through I don't believe can be tolerated by very many boyfriends, especially if you are in love. She agreed and we came to the following understanding; stripping stays in the club. This means no vacations, dinners, phone calls, no communication of any kind with customers outside the club.

I was once again feeling good about where we were...but can you really change a stripper?

Stripper Obsession

I certainly do not want to pretend I am an expert on this subject, but recently started noticing a personality trait that I wonder whether it is widespread amongst strippers;

Her life pretty much revolves around stipping much more than what I would consider "normal" for any employed person. Examples:
- Many conversations throughout the day starting with "I met this guy last night..."
- The need to workout, and then spend countless hours in front of the mirror looking for "fatty" areas that need to be focused on.
- No matter what we go shopping for there is the mandatory stop in several lingerie stores looking for the new outfit that could make her the extra money.
- Constant makeup experiments during the day, new hair styles, hair extentions, hair color.

I guess maybe some of these things would be very similar for anyone with a job as a model, actor, etc.

Over time this constant "obsession" has become another difficulty in our relationship. It is a double edged sword for me; on one hand I really want to know exactly what she is doing, but on the other hand I hate to hear it. After 3 years, still have not figured out how to reconcile this in my head...maybe I need 3 more years.

The relationship continues...

So we had moved past my original lies and our relationship blossomed. Because of her very flexible schedule and my captivation of her (and therefore my complete lack of caring as to what was going on at work) we travelled quite a bit. We could not keep our hands off each other and I really tought I had found the person I wanted to be with for the rest of my life.

Out of nowhere she came to me one night and told me she was doing something: One of her regular customers asked her to go to Vegas for 4 days. She told me she was doing it, she never really asked. I was completely confused. Why would she do this? She makes very good money, doesn't need to do this, he is already 100% sucked in by her. This was the beginning of:

JEALOUSY

What strippers think about their job and dating

There are two completely opposing views on what a stripper will say about their job and dating vs. what a man will say about stipping and dating one. Here is what they all say:

"Its just a job"

"I do it only for the money"

"I want to be independant"

Now this is what is said consistently by all. Many men (me included) have tried to get to get a stripper they were dating to quit, but very few are successful. Why is this? There is never one answer and each stripper (and each person) is different, I realize this. If you really press a stripper, and get some rare moments of absolute honesty you will get other answers as to why they do it:

- rebelling against their parents
- being told sex was bad as a child and young adult, now exploring sexuality
- the need to feel wanted
- the need to feel beautiful (people paying to see you is a great confidence booster)

I am very confident it is not just about the money. I have just heard too many times from men that have offered to replace the strippers income in other ways, and the stripper may do it for some time, but eventually go back to the club. They just can't seem to stay away!

I do realize that everyone has their own reasons for doing things and making decisions and there are many strippers who do it just for the money. But just as surely, there are many who don't.